Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Quote for the day

Friday, May 18, 2012

On Infertile Ground

I wanted to share this video clip with all of you On Infertile Ground, as some of you may know and some of you may not I have Secondary Infertility. This is heart breaking for me and many other women like me. I am sharing this with you in hopes that someday the medical and political community will recognize this a medical condition not  a matter of choices and give us funding for treatment allowing so many couples to be able to create the families they deserve to have.

I shared this clip on Facebook and on the some group pages I belong to and one women who may also suffer from infertility commented that she is a Wife, a Sister and Aunt that is enough for her that infertility is not the worst thing. I agree it is not but, the point of this film is that with funding we could help so many people.
 I am grateful everyday for my Son who is my greatest blessing, I am grateful to the Doctors and Science that helped us to have him but I do grieve the family we dreamed of, the family my Son prayed for and the family that I hope someday some special person will honor us with the gift of adoption and allow us to complete our family. I am also reminded everyday in so many ways of what I am not capable of doing, that part of being a woman and a Mother that my body is no longer able to do. I am unable to handle the medication required for me to become pregnant and possible even the pregnancy itself, I still grieve that and may till the end of my life. But I set out to enjoy each day and the little miracle I have been given and feel comfort in my heart knowing the babies I lost are in Heaven and my Great Grandmother is up there holding them and comforting them until one day when I can. All of that brings me comfort and the smile on my little Man's face everything morning fills my heart with a joy I can't explain.  I sincerely hope that one day all of my friends who have yet to experience this will be able to and believe that films like this can help us to achieve this.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Am I Mom Enough

This post has been many days in the making, and was a result of the Time Life cover Are You Mom Enough, it struck a cord with me and many other Mothers I am sure!

First let me say I am not opposed to extended nursing nor do I have anything against so called Attachment Parenting. What I am opposed to is labels, judgement and criticism, I feel the title of that article just sets us up to feel unless meet some stereotype we aren't Mom enough. Like the mother that after seeing me for I don't how many weeks at Story Time finally talked to me and confessed she felt like a bad mother because she couldn't give her 3 yr old the attention that he was used to getting before his brother came along, does that mean she isn't Mom enough or what about my friend who had to stop nursing her baby at only a few months old because she wasn't getting any support and sacrificing her own health to continue or myself who when my Son was only 3 weeks old crying in my kitchen because I was having to supplement him with formula because I wasn't producing enough breast milk to meet the requirements set out by his Dr at birth or am I less of a Mom because I have been unable to conceive another child even with the help of the Doctors,  does that mean my friend who nursed her daughter till well over 4 and much to the dismay of her partner does that mean she is a better Mom then all the rest of us?
Who and what determines how good of a Mom we are, in my opinion it is our children! Are they happy? Are they healthy? Are they growing? Are they meeting their milestones? But most importantly are we happy, do we feel Mom enough? The best piece advice ever given to me is that any decision has to reflect the best interest of the child but also the Mother. If we aren't happy then the child will not be either.
 I think as a society we are setting the bar so high for today's Mother to be this picture perfect Pinterest board, magazine ad Mom and that is not the reality. The reality is Mother hood is hard, it is messy and it isn't glamorous in any way!
I have been following this wonderful blog called Finding Joy she reminds me to enjoy the little things to let the mess happen because that is part of being little, to put one foot in front of the other and make time for one task off my list a day so I can feel like I accomplished something other than caring for a multitude of children ( I have 4 - 6 children in my care on any given day plus my Son)  and feeding my husband. She reminds me that I am "Mom Enough" even if I did not nurse my Son past 11mths or haven't birthed multiple children that I am "Mom Enough" just the way I am with all my flaws. So take some time today read her post Dear Over Worked Mom and realize that you are the perfect Mom for your child just the way you are even if your house is a mess and your baby is bottle fed!

Friday, May 11, 2012

Count Your Blessings

I ran across this incredibly sad story today of a young mother who gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and sadly contracted a deadly infection that took her life in one short week, leaving behind her newborn baby girl, two little boys and her husband. It's stories like this that reminds that although we weren't able to have the family we had hoped for we are blessed to be the family we are and have one amazing little man who we love and adore! God has a plan for us all and I believe with all my heart there is a reason our life has turned out the way it has and in time we will see that plan. We just need to remain faithful and know that this is the very best plan for our lives. So today I will hug my guys a little tighter and remember how truly blessed I am!
Please take and a few minutes out of your busy day and read this tragic story of this wonderful woman and if you feel moved make a donation to her family.
Alice Hansen Family